Secondary Waltz Songtext / Lyric

The school Christmas party is coming

We ain't doing rugby no more

McIntyre's teaching us waltzing

Out on the gymnasium floor

Out on the gymnasium floor



McIntyre's out of the Army

You'll be slippered if you get it wrong

McIntyre's din booms loud in the gym

And we've only got our little shorts on

We've only got our little shorts on



And it's one, two, three, two, two - we're all a disgrace

McIntyre tore us apart

And we danced with ourselves, when we'd all found a space

Waltzing with fear in our hearts

Waltzing with fear in our hearts.






Comes the day of the final maneuvers

All of our heads are awhirl

It's getting much closer to D-day

This time we're gonna do it with girls

This time we're gonna do it with girls



In the arena the ladies were waiting,

A 12 year old partner to guide

Some matches were fixed, the rest of us mixed

And a fat girl got left at the side

A fat girl got left at the side



And it's one, two, three, two, two - we're all a disgrace

McIntyre tore us apart

And we danced with ourselves, when we'd all found a space

Waltzing with fear in our hearts

Waltzing with fear in our hearts



When you come to my fights

And I'm under the lights

And you see that my footwork is false

Don't count me out, at the start of the bout

I'm just doing the Secondary Waltz

Doing the Secondary Waltz